Article 3: The Dog Clause

If a bro gets a dog, it must be atleast as tall as his knee when full grown. Corollary to this states, naming a lap-dog after a pro-wrestler or a character from a Steve McLain movie does not absolve a bro from this article.

This rule could be debatable if the owners of the small dogs actually had a legit argument, I mean, really? a little foot tall dog named Kimbo? Not okay bro, not okay. Even if the dog is super cute and has a freaking awesome name like Achilles or something, the dog just isn't manly. Sure, your wife might have made you buy a small dog becuase you're super whipped (sucks to suck huh?) but at least get a spaniel of some sort that, even though it is super cute, you have the ability (whether you use it or not) to go out and hunt what have you. Let's be legit here. If a toddler could strangle your fully grown dog with its bare hands, it's too small for you bro.